Today's article is about envy both in the Martial Arts and in life in general. Envy can be a huge obstacle on the path to success. Wikipedia describes envy clearly:
Envy is an emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another's superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it."
Recently, I went to a martial arts seminar in Redhill, Surrey in the UK.
The rain and traffic were both heavy on the M25 motorway as I drove there in my ancient car but the trip was worth it because of several insights it gave me. One insight in particular was especially valuable.
I discussed with a fourth degree black belt the problem of envy in the martial arts. There is lot of it! I was once appointed Vice-President of a large martial art organisation.
One blackbelt rushed up to me and asked me why I deserved to be the Vice-President! He may have thought he deserved that honour more than me. Maybe he was right but I was the Vice-President and he wasn't!
Some students look at a blackbelt and think that they deserve a blackbelt more. They may believe that they can kick harder or fight better etc. etc.
My friend, the fourth degree blackbelt, said that such people had no need to be envious.
All they have to do, to draw level with the person above them, is to take one grading after another. If they progress onwards step by step, they will achieve their own blackbelt.
A blackbelt is a white belt who never quit. There is no need for envy. Just keep training and taking each grading when you are ready and don't give up. You will eventually become a blackbelt and your white belt will turn black much sooner than you think.
If you become distracted by envying the ranks that other people achieve, you may give up early and never achieve the belt you aspire to.
I mentioned this insight to a class of mine this week. At the end of the lesson I asked what key ideas had been remembered. 'Don't be envious' was one of them.
The same principle applies to making money. Some people spend their time thinking about how unfair life is. They envy the rich. Why should some people make money so quickly and easily while they find it a continuous struggle just to keep the creditors away from their door?
Envy is usually a complete waste of time. People who appear to make money easily have put in hours of hard work to develop the skills they can now use to make money making seem easy.
All we need to do is copy them by working hard and developing the skills they have developed. They may well have written a book or manual telling us how to do what they have done. We just need to follow the recipe they give us.
Strangely, few people will do this and probably the complainers will be the ones least likely to take any kind of productive action. They are too busy being envious and making excuses for themselves.
This quote sums up the most productive attitude towards the riches of others:
"Don't just envy another's good fortune; emulate the work that helped earn it."
Of course, we are all born with different abilities and skills. There will always be someone who is better than you or me at all kinds of things. I was thrown out of the school choir at the age of eight for 'growling' and it was never likely that I would make a career as a singer or choir master.
Grand Master Kwang Jo Choi, the founder of Choikwangdo, once described the fact that not all martial arts students will be equally agile or flexible. Some are like a Ferrari; others are like a Ford.
According to the Grand Master, the Fords should not be judged by the same standard as the Ferraris but if they put in the same effort as the Ferraris, they are equally successful and should be graded accordingly.
The business world may not be as generous as the Grand Master but it will still reward the effort of a diligent worker even though the reward may be less than that given to a hard working genius.
Of course there are plenty of geniuses who do not work hard. They may well be outstripped by those of mediocre ability who work very hard.
In any event, there is no need for the Fords to be envious of the Ferraris. It would, again, be a waste of time and effort. The Fords may, of course, be like Ferraris in some other area of life or they could put in enough extra effort to become Ferraris themselves. Very hard work can create its own talent.
In the second week of Wimbledon 2007, Martina Navratilova said that attitude was the most important attribute she would look for in a young tennis player. We cannot always control what abilities we are given but we can control our attitude and this can make all the difference between winning and losing.
Even if we are Fords for life, we can achieve our own goals and look back on our lives as successful. Incidentally, I reached Redhill through the rain in heavy traffic and returned home through the rain in heavy traffic. I arrived at both destinations safely in a Ford.
A Ferrari would have been quicker, but the Ford was running well enough to help me reach my goals.
Don't ever waste time being envious if you are not a Ferrari. Just focus on dealing with all the tasks you are faced with on your way to your goal.
It is well worth remembering that the quickest way to deal with an overwhelming number of tasks is to do them one by one.
Let others get on with their own goals while you get on with yours. Take one step at a time and deal with one task at a time and your own progress will astonish you. None of us need to be envious of any one else.
Envy has been well described as "counting the other fellow's blessings instead of your own."
Instead let's start counting our own blessings and opportunities. Many of us have the opportunity to achieve a blackbelt or become rich or achieve the dreams we most desire. If we focus on such opportunities and work hard, we will not have the time or the desire to be envious.
I will finish with a great quote from Helen Gurley Brown (1922 -) the American writer and editor of Cosmopolitan Magazine. In the sixties she made it clear that women could have it all if they were prepared to work hard with what they had i.e. themselves. She wrote:
"The only thing that separates successful people from the ones who aren't is the willingness to work very, very hard."
Tags : ??????????????�??????????????? ??????????????�????????????????????? Civil Engineering
ไม่มีความคิดเห็น:
แสดงความคิดเห็น